


SPIDEYPOOL

by CrossBladeWing



Category: Deadpool - All Media Types, Spider-Man - All Media Types
Genre: I do NOT OWN the Deadpool Game either!, I do Not OWN Spiderman or Deadpool or any of its characters, I don't own Disney or Princess Bride or Ever After, I will add tags as I go, M/M, Not sure if i need to put disclaimers if i even mention other movies or stuff like that, Swearing, really bad censorship
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-11-17
Updated: 2016-01-31
Packaged: 2018-05-02 02:16:45
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,695
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5230064
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CrossBladeWing/pseuds/CrossBladeWing
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>[Yes. Very Original.]<br/>(Yeah.)<br/>[How many of these are there?]<br/>(uuhhh....)<br/>"Don't make me delete all of your scenes!"<br/>[(....)]<br/>"That's what i thought."<br/>Trying my hand a Spideypool since i've been reading so much of it lately. Mixing story plots from various shows and movies and comic books and video games.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Screwed. In EVERY sense of the word.

**Author's Note:**

> Peter is saved by a mysterious katana-wielding psycho---yeah this is going to go well.

Now Peter Benjamin Parker was a really smart guy--- scratch that Peter was a goddamn NERD-- and proud of it. He loved science: chemistry, biology, physics, the whole shebang. He was one of the best students on campus. Nevermind he was only 21 and only had a year left to go, beating the standard of 5-6 years in college. He got a lot of shit for it too. He was the scrawny little nerd with glasses alway carrying a heavy bag and papers in his hands. Guys loved to grab the papers and scatter them or make Peter fall over. Not that he minded it’s been the same since high-school. 

Ah, high school. Peter had lots of bittersweet memories of it. Most of it about being stuffed in a locker, pushed around, tripped, beaten up, etc. Some of it he’d rather not remember. But the spider bite changed his life. Now by day he was little nerd Peter Parker, but at night he was the amazing Spider-man. If only the guys following him knew that.

This had become almost a weekly occurrence, Peter would be followed by some guys from school, but this time was a bit different. (More like totally different) [Hush I’m reading.] He’d stayed late in the lab that Aunty May had called. “PETER BENJAMIN PARKER! Get yourself home right now or so help me I’ll come get you myself!” He’d lost track of time, he checked his watch and swore. It was almost 11pm! He panicked and rushed to put away equipment and chemicals. His spider-sense had tingled with her words and it rung as he gathered his things, locked up and left campus, and all down the few blocks he ran. It didn’t make much difference to him, it always seemed to ring when he was out alone, especially this late at night.

He was trying to make his way home, when he’s suddenly pulled into an alley. His sense continued to ring when a gun is placed on his forehead. His eyes adjusted to the darkness. A guy in thick dark clothes and a black mask and beanie was holding a pistol to his head. Around him were five other guys, one holding a pipe, another a long knife, another a chain, one cracked his brass knuckles, and one had a baseball bat. “What do we got here, fellas?” the guy with the gun says. His breath is thick with smoke and alcohol. “A fucking twank.” the guy with the pipe cackles. “True. true. And what do we do with little twanks like this?” the guy with the gun asks. “Have fun.” the guy with the chain says darkly. The other laughed and joked. His mind raced. Options: 1. Beat the guys up. Not good 2. See what they want. Most likely will end up with him dead. 3. Scream for help. Hope someone calls the cops or comes help or he gets beaten. He breaks out of his thoughts as the guys close in. He waits, but shifts his position ever so slightly. Then suddenly the guy holding a gun to his head gets his head sliced clean off.

Peter backs up as quickly as possible, but still gets blood on his over-sized jacket and face. He slumps against the alley wall, legs unmoving as he watches some guy, who’s just a red, black and silver blur, cut down the remaining guys. They ignore him and focus on the new guy. The new guy easily dodges their attacks and cuts through them. The guy with the pipe has his arms cut off just before the elbow, then his legs are cut from under him above the knees, finally his head is sliced off as he screams in agony. The others falter, but the guy with the swords goes after them. The guy with the knife tries to defend himself, but he’s sliced at the gut and his intestines start falling out as he clutches at them, he coughs up blood. The guy with the chains tries to hit the guy with them as he swings them screaming, “Fucking son of a bitch! Die! Fucking die!” he manages to get a few hits but the guy is quicker and slices his arm clean off and then slices him in half. The guy with the bat goes for a swing as he finishes slicing through, catching the guy in the side. He’s knocked but recovers and pierces the guy straight through a lung and his gut. He chokes as he falls. The guy with the brass knuckles tries to run but he’s run through the chest and then decapitated. When it’s over there’s a man standing in the middle of all the carnage, his shiny twin katanas drip rapidly cooling blood. 

The guy starts talking to himself. “Man haven’t had this much fun in ages.” (Hell yeah that was AWESOME!) [It was good and all, but that last one lacked] (Yeah we should’ve done something more fun.) His voice is deep and rough and raspy but somehow light. There some silence and then. “Yeah maybe we should’ve done something more intricate with the last one.” he continued. [Why did we kill those guys again?] (Cuz some cutie was being attacked.) [And we care why?] “Hey it ain’t my fault they were trying to kill some kid.” (Is he even here? Maybe he’ll thank us!) [No he left by now and besides who’d want to thank us anyway?] “Well we’d have to check.” More silence and then he looks down to his blades. (Lots of red.) [Obviously, we just killed five guys] (Oooh can we go out for burgers and fries?) [They wouldn’t be open at this time] -----

Meanwhile, Peter was looking up at the guy in shock. He basically massacred the guys mugging him, and his spidey sense rang like a high screeching whine now. He was still sprawled out by a wall and made a move to get up, which alerted the guy to him still being there. He quickly came out of his rant to turn toward him. The guy was bald, but from what he could see he had a bald and was built really well, tough and hard muscle, but his body was covered in scars. The guy was breathing heavily, his shirt so torn it barely hung on his body, but his piercing blue eyes were focused on him. He slowly came over to him, stepping over bodies and into pools of blood. He crouched down in front of him and he closed his eyes tight in anticipation. Rough hands directed his face back and his eyes snapped open. The guy’s face was inches from his own. The guy smiled at his wide gaze. “Name’s Deadpool, kid.”

Peter’s eyes widened. Holy MotherF***ing shit was he screwed!


	2. Positive This Is Crazy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peter is rescued by Deadpool...and now has a date with him?! How the hell did this happen? Well... Like this:

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been a rough week, but it's over!!! I can back into this!! Enjoy ^.^

“ Ok Parker. Deep breaths. What do we know about Deadpool?” Peter thought. His mind raced to give him an adequate answer. Deadpool a.k.a Merc with a Mouth a.k.a. the Regenerating Degenerate a.k.a the guy who just saved his life was an infamous mercenary who sold his services to the highest bidder and had blood and death and body parts follow in his path, along with a weird smell of tacos and pancakes and chilli. What he was doing in town, Peter didn’t want to know. He just needed to think of a way out of this. “Hey!” that rough voice shook him out of his thoughts. Peter snapped back to reality. He was in a dark cold alley, several rapidly cooling corpses and blood running down the walls and into puddles, and the most dangerous assassin is literally less than a foot away. He was caged in, by one scarred arm against the alley wall and another rough hand holding his chin in place. He noticed that the katanas were now neatly in their scabbard on Deadpool’s back which he doesn’t remember seeing a few seconds ago. “Hey you talking with the voices in your head too?” Deadpool asked. Peter looked at him. [Wow. Speechless. That’s a new one.] (Yeah when do you think he’ll start screaming?) Deadpool frowned at the voices and at Peter’s lack of a response. 

Peter took a deep breath and said, “No.” “Oh so he does speak.” Deadpool says in a sly voice. Peter instantly got defensive and frowned at him. Wait why was he just standing there? He had to move! He shook off Deadpool’s hand and half-stepped away, unfortunately a bit further into the alley, since Deadpool was blocking the one way out of the alley not covered in corpses and blood that Peter didn’t want to see. He faced him warily. Deadpool just watched him with an amused expression on his face. Then as soon as several cop cars, sirens blaring and stopping close by and a bunch of cops yelling, “Police! Hands up and FREEZE! behind their car doors assembled in front of the alley where Deadpool was standing, he turned away from Peter and flung something in there direction. Peter’s spider sense was deafening and he ran with all his will the other way, not caring as he was running over blood and bodies, staining his pants and shirt. once he got out of the alley he dove out of the way as fire and a huge “BOOM” resounded, smashing windows and triggering car alarms. 

Peter slowly got up after some dust settled, but his ears were ringing worse than his spider sense. He shook his head out of it and staggered to his feet, using a wall, that had remained intact as a crutch. He felt his phone buzz again with a call, once he checked it he saw that he had at least 7 missed calls from Aunt May. “Damn.” Peter said, looking down at himself. He was covered in dirt and some mud, some blood on his shoes and socks, a few scrapes here and there, even his bag was torn. He quickly checked to see if his camera survived and he sighed in relief when he saw it was relatively ok. After leaning against the wall for a bit, slowly getting his hearing back. “Thank you healing factor.” Peter muttered as he made his way down the street without glancing back. 

Meanwhile, Deadpool had ran back behind the dumpster and a large “BOOM” and lots of fire filled the alleyway, torching bodies, blood, and car parts. When Deadpool came to from behind the dumpster, all the cops and cars were blown-up, bodies and parts charred and smouldering and blocks of other cars sirens blaring. [That took forever.] (Yeah and we got torched.) Deadpool looked down at himself, most of his clothes were gone, but enough of his pants survived to cover his junk. (Hehe. Wait until Al sees us.) [I don’t think she’ll want to.] Deadpool nodded in agreement. He looked around the carnage once again. “Not bad for a homebrewed grenade.” (Yeah this is AWESOME.) [But we’ll have to make more. That was the only one we made that didn’t explode in our face before we could finish it.] “What was it made of again?” (uuuhhhh...) [Hell if we know genius--Hey! Where’s the kid?] (What kid?) [The one we saved!] (OOOHHH. s he dead too?) “I hope not he had too nice of an as to be un-alived!” Deadpool said. Yellow and White agreed, ten went on a long rant to compare Peter’s ass with others. Deadpool was tuning them out searching the bodies, but couldn’t find anything until he passed close to the back of the alley where on the ground was a slightly singed wallet. Inside he found the ID of one Peter Benjamin Parker.

\-------Several Days Later------

Peter sighed as he made his way home at around 6 pm. He had tried---emphasis on TRIED---to convince Aunt May that he’d tripped and hit his head in school and got really dirty hastily putting away chemicals as he was going home. His aunt didn’t seem to believe him, but she didn’t press him either. However, she did make him agree that he’d be back home everyday by at least 7pm ever since. And made sure he’d be more careful with his lab work. The incident in the alleyway made the news and the Bugle, but so far the case was still cold. Peter had panicked when he found out he’d lost his wallet, but didn’t freak out too much all that was in his wallet were his ID’s and some money. His ID’s could be replaced and he had shrugged it off after a few days and went on his life like normal and his patrols like normal, but secretly he still wondered what happened to Deadpool. He didn’t even thank the guy, insane though he was, for saving him. He shook himself out of his thoughts reassuring himself. “I could’ve taken those guys myself easily and I’ll probably never see him anyway.” The thought wasn’t as comforting as he thought it would be. 

Once Peter got home he was surprised to hear the sound of his Aunt laughing. Once Peter got inside he found his aunt in the kitchen talking on the phone with someone. “---Oh really? ---Haha! A true Bea Arthur fan aren’t you?---Oh no it’s no trouble!---Oh he’s just come in the door.” Peter hung up his coat and bag and came over to her. She held the phone out to him. “A nice classmate of yours found your wallet. He says his name is Wade.” Peter’s brows furrowed and then his spider sense kicked in. He took the phone from his aunt, slow enough so that she didn’t get suspicious. “I’m off to do some laundry. And I approve.” She said as she walked down the hall. Peter looked at her retreating back with a confused expression before hesitantly putting the phone to his ear. “Hello?” he asked. “HIYA Petey-Pie!” a loud deep voice said. Peter pulled away the phone from his ear and then put it back. “Who is this? What do you want?” he asked suspiciously. “Why it’s me! You know the guy from the other night---of course he remembers who I am!!---I liked her too but we called in the first place to talk to Peter!---” He went on a long rant like he was talking to someone. 

Peter was about to hang up,when suddenly he heard, “Don’t hang up!!” Peter froze and put the phone back to his ear. “Like I was saying, you should know who this is.” Peter didn’t say anything. “I’m waiting~” the voice sang. “Deadpool.” Peter finally said. “See? he does remember us! Now then Petey, as to why we’re calling we think you should thank us!” Deadpool said. What? “What?” Peter voiced. “Ya know i saved your butt---Yes it is---we want you to give us a nice thank you and a kiss!” Deadpool said practically on the verge of squealing. Peter couldn’t believe what he was hearing. “Uh...why?” he asked. “It’s polite and courteous! haven’t you seen the Princess Bride? Or Ever After? Or Disney movies? Or----” “I get it!” Peter interrupted, but Deadpool kept on going. Peter stopped listening and used the time to catch up his thoughts. He was being a bit rude, not at least saying thank you, but the guy was clearly nuts. He did save his live though, even if Peter could’ve handled it. “Thank you.” he said and Deadpool’s rant stopped. “....what?” he whispered. “Thank you, you know for saving me...” Peter trailed off. Good god what was he DOING?

Peter heard nothing from the other end and then, “So does this mean I can go on a date with you?” Peter stopped; stopped breathing, stopped thinking, stopped fidgeting, just stopped. “...what?” it was his turn to breathe. “You know I get to take you out as your thanks. I even got your mom to approve.” Deadpool explained. “She’s not my mom she’s my aunt...”Peter said, mind reeling. His aunt approved? Deadpool wanted to date him? What? “Oh ok---no that was the other universe---so when shall I give you back your wallet?” “You have my wallet?” Peter asked lamely, trying to focus on something else. “Yeah cutie. I could give it back to you on our date?” he asked. “Um...” Peter said. “PETER! Come help me out please!” his aunt yelled. Peter jumped. “Uh... i got to go.” “Sure that’s fine I’ll pick you up this Friday at 6!” “Ok.” Peter answered hastily. “Great! See you then sweetums!!” The line went dead. Peter slumped against the wall. Aunt May passed by with a basket of laundry. “I’ll be waiting for you in the living room to help me with this.” She smiled at Peter’s flushed face.

Peter’s mind and spider sense were screaming at him. HOLY SH*T What the F*** did he just agree to?! Whatever it was or whatever it was going to be he was positive it was crazy.

\----Meanwhile----

On a rooftop, far off from Peter's house was Deadpool, peering through a sniper scope, a phone at his ear. He lifts his head up from the scope and picks up the rifle, turning to you he puts a finger up to his facemask. "Shhhhh."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dun. Dun. DUUUNNN!~~  
> Leave a comment or review. How am I doing? Hope you liked it thanks! :)


	3. Insane

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Onto the date! This is going to go well...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So sorry for the late update (if anyone was looking forward to this or not)  
> Reasons: finals and holidays [Busy aren't we?]

Days pass and now it’s Friday. Peter is freaking out---okay that’s the understatement of the century---Peter is FLIPPING THE F*** OUT! He’d been a mess all week. He’d be called on during lectures because he spaced out, he almost made his chemicals explode because he wasn’t paying attention, he’d trip or run into things, which would have injured him if he didn’t have his healing factor and overall durability (Or lack of it!) [This is not our point of view.] (You’re no fun.) Damn it, he almost frigging died because he was so focused on today. On his patrols he was slipping, he was almost blown up by the Green Goblin, almost let robbers get away, almost got crushed by falling debris due to the Rhino slamming into walls and making the friggin ceiling collapse. Peter had never been so relieved he had a spider sense. Given, a highly wanted mercenary assassin was taking out for dinner, so Peter’s worries weren’t totally unfounded.

Still at the end of each day he felt ridiculous for worrying, but then he thought of what could happen if he didn’t comply. He tried not to think of them, but the doubts rose in his mind. Now he was pacing back and forth in his room. He had several of his clothes picked out and laid there while he remained in a plain t-shirt and shorts. (Dat asss tho~<3) [Agreed.] He had some of his good flannels, graphic tees, his jeans, cargo pants, and his sweaters and jackets laid out---GOD he was acting like a f***ing girl!! He winced as he passed his window that looked into the room a certain redhead used to live in... The family long since moved out after everything that happened. He shook his head at the thought, trying not to let the depression in. “It was years ago Peter, get over it!! It’s done.” he thought. He sighed and finally decided to just go in his jeans, graphic T-shirt of the Avengers, and his brown jacket. He grabbed a messenger bag on the way down.

As Peter went down the stairs, his Aunt May was coming up. She smiled encouragingly at him and said, “Have fun Peter. Call me if you’ll be late.” She went upstairs. Peter was left on the stairs by the door with his thoughts as he grabbed his red converse. He waited by the door for a good few minutes collecting himself. Then he went outside, where he saw Deadpool with a motorcycle, with a basket in front with a makeshift toy of Wolverine, a flag, a horn, and few brightly colored buttons. Deadpool himself was busy putting a banana and some booze (including the bottle) into the fuel tank. Peter also noticed a makeshift ramp with the Deadpool logo about 200 feet away from the bike. He just stopped at his porch and gaped at him. Deadpool finally noticed him and waved. He was wearing his mask, but he also wore a high-necked red hoodie, jeans and old black combat boots, his hands still had their gloves as well. “Hello~~PETEYPIE!!” He said. “Uh? What is that?” Peter asked nervously. “This?” Deadpool gestured to the bike. Peter nodded. “Our ride.” He answers. “And the ramp is for?...” he asks. “So we can get sweet air-time, like we did in my video game!!” (Fun times!!) [Except for the crashing part.] “Shh! He doesn’t know that!!” he yelled. 

Peter just shook his head, pinching the bridge of his nose. Why hadn’t he just run away again? Oh yeah cuz the mercenary could just go find him. “Sooo...anyway---” he heard. Peter jerked when he found Deadpool basically in front of him. When had he gotten so close? Peter yelped and jerked back. Deadpool almost looked...hurt? “Aww...sorry. Did I scare you?” he said in a somewhat unconvincing mocking tone. Peter glared and then blushed but said nothing. “Aww~you’re so cute!!” Deadpool gushed, which made Peter’s blush darken, but his annoyance faded. “So you got my wallet?” Peter asked turning back to him. “Yeah, but date first sweetums~” Peter resigned himself, “Fine.” There was an awkward silence after that. Deadpool seemed to be staring at him and he’d gone surprisingly silent. What did he say? Peter was confused.

“Really? Just like that?” came a quiet whisper. Peter stared hard at Deadpool. “This was YOUR idea.” he said annoyance creeping back. Peter was getting more agitated by the second. He was met with silence. He ran a hand down his face. “So are we going or what?” he asked. Deadpool seemed to snap back. He seemed to grin as he lurched forward and took Peter’s arm. He dragged him towards the bike. “Wait! We’re really taking that thing?!” Peter said panicking. “Of course!” Deadpool says enthusiastically. Peter can’t really protest as Deadpool just about picks him up, sets him on the bike, and straps a helmet to his head. Deadpool revs the engine and aims for the shoddy (shitty) [piece of crap] ramp. Peter has just enough time to wrap his arms around his torso, before they’re blasting off into the air, over houses, streets, a park to the waterfront.

Peter is terrified, he’s flying through the air at at least 100 miles an hour. Deadpool is screaming, “WOOOOOOOOOOO~~~” over the rushing of wind in his ears. He clutches around the warm tough body in his arms and holds on for dear life as he screams. Deadpool can see the target “X” in a bullseyes he’d painted in the spot where he thought they’d land, but they miss it entirely. ([“OH SHIT!!”]) But the miraculously {by the power of the author}land on the ground in the parking lot, down a conveniently placed ramp for the motor show, which they go through. They leap up ramps and over mounds and through rings of fire, before doing a wheelie around the parking lot and then parking in an open space.  
Deadpool and Peter have equal expressions of shock and awe at the fact they were in one piece. Peter started hysterically laughing and held onto Deadpool’s back, tucking his face into to muffle the laughter. Meanwhile, Deadpool’s voices were going off a mile a minute. (That. Was. AWESOME. Can we do it again?) [It was, but I don’t think the author will let us] ( awww....) [Don’t complain to me!] (*gives puppy face to author*) [How can you do that we don’t have faces?] (Through DETERMINATION *wink wink nudge nudge*) [*facepalms*] {author blanks out any further interruption of boxes for the remainder of the chapter} ([Hey--]) Wade is snapped out of his head and just listens to Peter’s laughter. He finds he likes the sound as much as he likes Peter holding onto him. He carefully moves his hands from the bike’s handles and places them, slowly, onto Peter’s arms, holding them as he holds him.

Peter’s laughter dies down and he slowly realizes that he’s holding onto the mercenary. He also feels the mercenary’s hand over his. He quickly let’s go and gets off the bike with ease, placing the helmet on the back seat where he was sitting. A blush was covering his face from ear to ear. He was looking down, but chanced a glance back at Deadpool who now turned to face him that same expression on his face from when they were standing in his front yard. “What?” he asked. Deadpool shook his head, as if clearing his thoughts, but there were none his mind was quiet at the moment. Weird that hasn’t happened in years. Peter looks at him funny, but takes in their surroundings. They’re at the boardwalk and there’s a really big carnival going on. There are booths and tents set up along the boardwalk and it stretches down either way Peter can see, but in the middle of it all is a huge red and white striped tent. Peter waves a hand in front of Deadpool to get his attention back. “So...date?” he said hesitantly. Deadpool smiles beneath his mask and jumps off the bike, taking Peter’s hand and runs towards the ticket booth.

Once they’re inside they take the time to walk around to a nearby bench by a taco booth, which Wade immediately goes to and orders food from. Peter is sitting down and is left with his thoughts for a bit. It wasn’t so bad, but one part of his brain (spider sense) was still harboring the notion that Deadpool cold snap at some point. He was starting to question his judgement, but he resigned himself to getting his wallet back. Then another part of his brain wondered if it was his curiosity that led him to do this. He shook himself out of his thoughts as Deadpool approached with food. He sat down next to Peter and handed him a couple tacos. He stared at the food and then at Deadpool. Did he really just walk up and order food with the mask on? “Of course!” came Deadpool’s reply. Whoops. Peter hadn’t known he’d said that outloud. He blushed again, as Deadpool started biting into his taco...through his mask. 

Most of it just seemed to land in his lap at which he frowned and muttered to himself. Peter watched this as he started to dig into his own taco. It wasn’t so bad, but not as great as his aunt’s cooking. He sideways watched Deadpool eat and after swallowing a bite said, “You know you could roll your mask up, right? Wouldn’t it be easier for you to eat?” Deadpool stopped his half-way messed up taco to his face to turn to Peter. His face seemed surprised. “Well, sweet cheeks i didn’t know you wanted to see me so much~” he teased, but it seemed forced. Peter blushed and glared, “Seriously.” “And you don’t seriously want to see my ugly mug.” Deadpool’s mood turned bitter. Peter’s brows furrowed as he heard this. “Alright, then suit yourself.” he said dismissively. He went back to eating and once again Deadpool resumed eating, his usual {whatever “usual” was for him} mood and while he was talking, he was doing it with his mouth full, so...Peter had absolutely no idea what he was talking about. After they were done eating, Deadpool asked, “To the booths Petey pie! I wanna see how many ways I can whoop that sexy ass of yours!” Deadpool waggled his brows under the mask and most certainly had a shit-eating grin under there too. Peter’s competitive side came out when he sassily replied, “Bring it, but if I win I get my wallet back.” Deadpool nodded, “Sure but if I win sweetums...” He trailed off. Flushing, Peter stuck his hand out and Deadpool looked at it before shaking it. 

They hit the booths throughout the carnival, played ring toss, a shooting booth, darts, water balloons, a giant whack-a -mole, those weird strength things with a bell on top, laser tag, etc. He was owned at the shooting booth and was given a nice plushie of Spiderman as a gift. Peter was nervous to accept it but he did. He was seriously confused by Deadpool. His mood kept swinging from happy to joyful to brooding to snarky. Peter was being constantly kept on his toes, but he did find himself enjoying their times together, even when Deadpool started rambling about alternate timelines and spoke to no one in particular, sometimes yelling at the sky. People gave them a wide birth and Deadpool kept his attention from their stares. And before he knew it the day was over. 

They headed back to the parking lot and got on the bike, ths time Peter just didn’t question it and took hold of Deadpool’s waist. They were wheeling down the street in no time. Peter heard laughter from both himself and Deadpool as they raced down streets to his home. Why they couldn’t just ride to the boardwalk like this Peter had no idea, but was too giddy and pumped up on adrenaline to care. Deadpool dropped him off and as Peter slid of the bike, he took his hand. Peter froze and slowly looked at him. “Did I show you a good time or what?” he asked. Peter smiled shyly. “It wasn’t so bad.” Deadpool was grinning under his mask. Peters spidey sense started to ring, but before he could move Deadpool quickly tugged Peter down and kissed his cheek. “Awesome! See you around, Petey~~” He said while speeding off, screaming random things at the top of his lungs.

Peter was so shocked he just quietly made his way to the door of his house, opened it and once inside, slid down the door holding his cheek. A furious blush bloomed on his face. What? Had...? Did he just--- Peter sat there for a few minutes calming down his nerves before he scrambled to his feet when he heard his Aunt. “Peter? Is that you?” “Y-yes...” Peter gulped as that came out a quiet and several octaves higher than it should’ve. He started again, “Yes, Aunt May.” It was better but still shook. He hurried up the stairs as she came to the door. “How did it go?” she called. “It was fine.” he answered a bit quickly as he closed the door of his room. He sat on his bed head in his hands. Really? Had he actually let that happen?

He groaned into his hand as he leaned forward, only to feel something in his back pocket. He pulled out his wallet. He gawked at it. How did? When did? HOW DID HE NOT NOTICE IT THERE? Wow, he was slipping. FUCK. He opened it to check if everything was there. All his I.D’s, some old receipts and a note. Hold on. What? He took the note out and it held a number along with a “Call me sometime, ok? <3 Deadpool”. Well then. The blush seemed permanent on his face. He went on a date with an insane mercenary, actually STAYed with said mercenary throughout the date, gotten a plushie of himself as Spiderman, had been dropped off, kissed, and was now internally monologuing the whole thing. Jesus, was he INSANE?! Peter decide to curl up and sleep, he could deal with all of this in the morning. He curled up with the plushie and went to sleep, dreaming of tacos and red and black and a circus.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What did you think? :)


	4. Did that just happen?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's a New Year i'm caught up in another fic but i wanna finish this one too.

So some time has passed since Peter had seen or heard from the mercenary. It’s like the guy dropped off the planet!! So Peter did some digging...and couldn’t find a thing other some articles about hits they guys has taken in the last few years. Yup, killer confirmed. DUH. Peter didn’t want to risk anyone else finding out what he was looking for so he couldn’t dig up as much as he liked. After a couple of weeks with no word, no calls, no texts, Peter calmed down enough and got back into the swing (Haha!) of his routine. That is until this particular night.

It was night. The moon was full and Spider-man was swinging along the buildings, patrolling. He’d already gotten his shots and was heading home, but he hears gunshots, several in fact, coming from a bank. He heads towards it. There are robbers with guns and sacks of money in the bank, It’s closed for the night, but the alarms aren’t going off. It’s dark. Perfect. He sneaks in through a broken window. There’s a man, who’s been shot several times. Sh*t. He was desperately looking at him. Peter put a finger to his mask, so the guy would be quiet. He solemnly nodded, placing pressure on the bullet wound on his torso. He wastes no time webbing the goons to the ceiling, sealing their mouths for good measure. Then he hears the click of a gun. His spidey senses ring as he dodges a bullet. It’s the guy who was shot, or at least he was. He’s grinning evilly now. Double Sh*t.

There’s more men. They were probably waiting for him. He doesn’t have time to count the guns and men.“Shoot the Spider!” one calls. Peter ducks behind the counter, curling underneath a desk. He hears bullets against the wood and wall. Thankfully the wood holds, but then he hears. “Stop! Stop! Fuck!!” The guns stop one by one. Peter hears their footsteps, but then another voice pipes in. “OOHHH~ This looks fun! Lemme join in!” The voice is familiar.“WHAT THE--” Bang. A thud. A few moments of silence. “Sh*t, is that?---” “No way---” “I’m outta here!” More steps, this time going away. “Hey! Get your ass back---” A grunt. “Now that wasn’t very nice~” A click. Another bang. Peter crawls out and crouches by the counter, just as a guy goes sailing over his head. The guy hits the back wall and slumps. Peter sees the bullet hole in their head. There’s more gunfire. then the hurrying of footsteps, running away. Some screaming and some yelling profanities, Peter would file away later.

Why the hell? He gets up, and leans over the counter, only to duck when a bullet goes for his head. Deadpool os laying on the floor, broken wood, glass, a could of dead guys around him. He’s full of holes. He coughs when he sees him. “Well...look who we have here. the one and only Spider-man!” he cheers, then coughs. “Why the hell are you here?” Peter demands. Voice a little off from what the hell happened. “Aww... is that anyway to thank the guy who saved your ass?” Peter hopped over the counter. “A fine ass at that...” Peter flushed under his mask, good thing Deadpool couldn’t see it.

He looked away, the place was trashed, the guys he’d stuck to the ceiling weren’t there, probably cut loose. Some of the bags of money were still there, but some were gone. Jeez he was not having a good night. He put a face to his hand. Peter looked outside, it was starting to rain. When did?...Whatever, but he also heard sirens. someone must’ve called the cops. He was going to leave when he thought of Deadpool on the floor. He did just save him...again... He was quiet, strangely. Was he dead? He quickly went over to him and checked for a pulse. It was weak, but it was there. He was unconscious. the sirens were getting closer. He took Deadpools gun, stuck them in their holsters somewhat awkwardly and then grabbed the merc, running out the door and slinging a web up and out of sight just as police cars pull up. The bank then proceeds to explode. 

He looks back. What the? His spidey sense rings as Deadpool stirs, placing a gun to his head. “Hey---” Peter drops him onto a roof, sticking to the side of a building. He disappears just to reappear on a nearby roof of a building. “That’s not very nice!” he calls up. “Yeah well putting a gun to my head isn’t great either!” he sasses back. He slings a web and decides to leave when suddenly, Deadpool is on the side of the building with him, but he’s standing. They look at each other. “Uh...” He’s falling again. [Not the best idea big guy.] (Yeah!) He’s back on the roof again. Peter decides to swing away, so away he goes. But he feels he’s being followed. 

He turns around and sure enough Deadpool is teleporting behind him from roof to roof. Triple Sh*t. He swings faster or hides behind buildings, but still the merc finds a way to catch up to him as he goes. He decides to confront him instead of leading him to his house. Yeah...no. He lands on a roof that has a very nice garden on top of it. He stands under a tree, close to the edge of the building just in case. Deadpool teleports to the roof and they square off a little. Deadpool looks like he’s grinning under his mask. “Spider-man~ It’s an honor to meet you.” He bows, exaggeratedly. Peter crosses his arms. “What do you want, Deadpool?” The whites of his mask widen. “You know who I am?” Peter scoffs. “Yeah.” He does a little dance and claps excitedly like a kid. He’s muttering to himself again. “Why are you following me?” Peter asks. Deadpool stops and looks at him, now somehow shy?... “uh....” Peter was surprised. He was at a loss for words. Well then. He started edging towards the edge of the building. the rain continues to fall. He didn’t have time for this, it was getting cold, he was getting wet. He had to go home.

There’s the spidey sense again as Deadpool is gone and suddenly, there are arms wrapped around him and he’s falling to...somewhere. They’re in another alley, between buildings and it’s still raining. As soon as Deadpool let’s go, Peter latches onto the fire escape of a building, crouched and looking at him. “What the hell, Deadpool?!” His head is spinning a little. He’d never gone through that before, sure he was used to great heights, but not sudden random relocation! “Awww, but this is like exactly where you kissed the sexy reds broad in the movie!!!!” He complained. WHAT? Peter’s mind reeled. He shook his head, no don’t think about it. “Ok. I’m going to leave. You’re not going to follow me. And we will never speak of this ever.” he said. “But! Spidey---” Peter interrupts him. “Nuh-uh, man. No. I’m leaving.” 

He swings a web up to the roof and runs, but his arm is caught and he’s spun around. He’s held in Deadpools arms and he’s being kissed, given there are masks between both of their faces, but he’s being kissed. Peter’s brain sputters and dies. It’s warm, but has a tang of metal or maybe blood? and spices. Then it’s over and Deadpool teleports away without a word...Peter just doesn’t think and before he knows it he’s climbing through his window. He’s dripping wet as he sits on his bed, pulling his mask off. He feels like he’s in shock. Did that just happen? Yup, he still feels the warmth, the bite of metal, blood, and spices of a mask. Peter turns red, steam almost coming out of his ears as he curls up, suit still on and almost ripping his pillow in two as he screams into it. mhphhouzhyhAg0UQ8EHAOUy]gHJbojham----[REDACTED]

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know if it's what you expected, but i wanted it to feel fast and leave you like, "What?..."


	5. Everybody RUN!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> note to self: don't go looking for trouble it finds you anyway

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i've been busy with crap (like other fics) but i want to finish this one off as well! don't worry!
> 
> I DO NOT OWN THE SPIDERMAN MOVIE

. . .Peter was regretting a lot of things right now, but nothing more than this moment. “SO~Spidey~Once this is over, wanna go out for tacos?” Deadpool drawls at his back. Peter said nothing but contemplated the events of the night that led up to this.

~*SEVERAL HOURS EARLIER*~ (Rewind!) [Here we go...]

For the past several weeks, between school and patrolling, Peter didn’t see or hear from Deadpool as much as Spider-man did. He seemed to somehow pop-up whenever Spiderman was on patrol or in the middle of taking pictures, without the flash of course. It seriously got on Peter’s nerves. He’d be swinging through the skyscape and then BOOM! blindsided by a certain red and black mercenary! Or go home and look at the pictures and find he was photo-bombed, unintentionally or not. Enough was enough! He was going to deal with all of it TONIGHT. He swung out the window with this mind-set.

And of course, when Spiderman went out looking for the Merc with A Mouth, he can’t find him anywhere. After a few fruitless hours of searching, Peter decides to call it a night, he got his photos, stopped some stupid thugs from beating up a kid, there was no sign of Deadpool. Then there’s his spider sense again, ringing like a church bell as he spots a bright light of fre in the distance. He immediately swings in that direction, stashing his camera on the roof of some building. It’s an old brick apartment complex, where it seems the fire has spread quickly throughout the 2nd and 3rd floors. There’s people outside covered in ash and others helping their neighbors out on the sidewalk, people coming down the fire escape, but there’s still screaming inside.

Peter, smashes through the closet window of the top floor, with the least flames. The fire is spreading and he’d have to work fast. There’s a girl’s screaming in the room next to him. He runs through the apartment and into a child’s room. The screaming is from under the bed. He looks under and there’s a little girl of about 5 or 6 clutching her rabbit toy and crying and screaming. He pulls her out and she clings to him as he goes through the same window and lands on the sidewalk and places her down. “My Baby!” a young mother cries. “Mommy!” she answers running to her.

He can see firetrucks coming their way, but there are still people trapped inside. He goes in several more times, taking out an elderly man and a woman with a broken leg, before the firefighters can get through to hosing the place down. However, there’s one more scream coming from inside the building, which is almost completely up in flames. He goes in again. There’s fire everywhere and pieces of the ceiling are falling down at him. “Where are you?” he calls, but there’s only more crackling fire. He quickly runs around through the halls and doors until he finally sees someone .There’s a figure in a blanket walking around. (This is a...) [Trap]

“Hello? Sir? I’m here to help!” he says. The figure stops and looks over to him. Then his spider sense goes off as something round is thrown at him, he dodges it, just for it to explode out little syringes which inject him with something. **** He falls to the floor as whatever it was that was injected to him goes through his system. He tries to stay awake but the other thing he sees is green and then red and black and then a mix of blurry red and black...then just all black.

~*FAST FORWARD TO NOW*~(I don’t feel good...) [Don’t you da---] (Blerrrggg...) [REDACTED]

And now he was stuck tied to the merc with a bunch of explosives rigged to them, which was going to detonate in 1:29-1:28-1:27.... **** “So...Spidey---” “Not now, Deadpool!” he said, thinking. (Rude.) [Indeed.] 1:05-1:04-1:03...Peter struggles against the ropes binding him and Deadpool. Then all of a sudden he feels the ropes fall away and he immediately jumps to the ceiling and crawls for the window. “HEY!” Deadpool’s voice calls. He crawls out and looks around. Abandoned factory, but there are still people around. He feels the wind and smells the sea. Wait...the wind? Peter touches his face. His mask is torn, but still relatively intact, kinda...He hangs by the window to look at Deadpool and stops.

Deadpool is almost completely naked, except for a few remnants of his suit, thankfully covering his important bits and some of it clung to his chest and one arm and down to the knee of one leg. Peter stared, Deadpool’s skin was RIPPED, both literally and figuratively. Hard muscle and scar tissue and it was moving constantly. He had the bluest eyes Peter’d ever seen. “What?” he asked and Peter shook himself out of it. “We’re in a warehouse.” “Yeah and?” “There’re explosives.” “Yup!” “We should go?” “Sure.” Peter frowned. “Never expected you to be a brunette, actually thought you were a red-head like Black Widow.” Deadpool said. Peter said nothing---he was SO done with this bull****---but webbed him anyway and tugged his heavy *** out of the building while he shouted, “EVERYBODY RUN THERE ARE BOMBS!! RUN AWAY! FLEE!” 

The result was people staring and pointing at them and some people actually screaming and yelling at them. Deadpool yelled back just as much. A vein almost popped in Peter’s head. “Shut up WADE!” Peter said. Deadpool froze, then jerked to him. “How the hell do you know my name?” he demanded. Peter just dropped him onto the nearest roof and swung away, cursing at himself as the bombs went off and screaming and a fire erupted. Peter panicked and screwed up. He took out his frustration and anger out on the buildings and webs, swinging, flipping, doing dangerous stunts. Then he remembered his camera and immediately went back for it, before heading home.

He crawled into his room, peeling off his suit and just bundled up under the covers. 

Meanwhile...

(Spidey knows?) [He’s known before.]

(Oh right....) [Idiot.] 

(But he KNOWS us!) [SO do we.]

“(Really?)”

[Ugh. Just read the next chapter!]

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> next time: ([Our turn.])

**Author's Note:**

> Leave a comment or review. Never done this in my life, feel free to criticize, but don't flame too much thanks ;)


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